Invisible words were such fun when we were kids. Remember squashing lemons to create magic ink? We would write our secret messages in lemon juice, wait for it to dry, and then give a seemingly blank piece of paper to our friends. Those in the know immediately decoded the message using a candle to brown the paper, revealing the words in a darker shade of burnt. Somehow we managed to not destroy any great buildings or need any hospital visits while performing these dark arts.
Invisible messaging is still around, and perhaps even more pervasive in the social media society. It is often the unspoken and implied words that form the backdrop to the world of text we live in. Advertising is the most obvious example, where most often the hidden message is you are lacking if you don't own The Product or Lifestyle choice on offer. Invisible messaging is often about comparison, and implied criticism. It can be very destructive.
For most of my life I have struggled with the balance of being visible and invisible. Most often as a child I wanted to blend in with the wall paint, and I think I used a beige personality to achieve this. Being invisible allows you freedom of movement, and access to knowledge that people don't realisze you are gathering. Much like a spy in a war - blend in or hide in plain sight, and use the cover to keep safe. But as I got older, I so wished to be seen. Really seen, and this meant I had to show more colours than beige, and actually find out what colours suit who I am. It is a long process.
Women tend to be more invisible than men. It is not uncommon when I am out with Andrew that I greet someone, and they reply with a greeting to Andrew only. It frustrates me no end. It is not news that women have been overlooked and underestimated for centuries, but it is time to achieve some balance. That's what I am working on now - seeing people as they want to be seen (beige or bright), hearing people and listening for both the words and the invisible messages in their tone, body language and what is left unsaid. Maybe then, when people are heard and seen, we can use the lemon juice for more tasty experiments than secret letters.
Like this one - an upside down lemon pudding:
